One can liken it to the process of a sword being crafted by a blacksmith. You'd need fire and water to temper the steel. One can also liken it to a house - you need a good foundation and constant upkeep as it's weathered down.
what is there for two people to hold on to in relationships? What choices do people have to make to be certain? The mind versus the heart. The good versus the bad.
All relationships have a mix of positive and negative experiences. What is important in recovery, is to look past the negative and focus on the positive. Negative experiences can be corrected and fixed to prevent recurrence if two people in love and commitment work together to resolve them and consequently give themselves time to heal and become better. Positive experiences can be recreated and have more of to flourish a relationship.
The mind and the heart work together. But they both serve different purposes and ideologies. The mind serves as a filter of the heart from the outside the same way it filters whatever the heart lets out - supposedly. Relationships are a matter of heart. If the mind was to decide on the matters of heart and relationships, then it should be making decisions based on rationale and practicality. The mind will decide based on satisfying physical and circumstantial needs - money, food, shelter, etc. The heart on the other hand decides something that transcends the physical and spiritual. As a filter though, the mind can come into conflict with the heart as an act of self-preservation.
Don't confuse the heart and the mind.
Relationships are not meant to be perfect, but it requires both people together to fight for it.
The commitment is there, but the fire of the fight needs rekindling.
1 month. Cool off.