Monday, June 23, 2014

CH227: Wrap Up

1. "I root for all things and persons that challenge social norm because they foster tolerance and respect."
-Tweeted in response to seeing a native (aeta?) Filipina youth performing on The Voice Kids edition

2. "Secrets are corrosive. A cake left hidden will become stale."
"Like and love are different by 2 letters and that makes all the difference."
-Quotable quotes spoken to friends over on our whatsapp group

3. "Pain demands to be felt"
-quote from The Fault in Our Stars movie I watched with Ange yesterday.
-I believe pain forms and shapes our beings more profoundly than good experiences. Only through pain and struggles do we develop the skin to endure harder strifes and challenges. But it doesn't mean we go seeking to experience them

4. As the days come closer to knowing the results of my application (TBR - to be revealed ... eventually - because I don't want to risk preempting it by letting too many people know about it superstition), I feel calmer and more excited about the next steps in life that will open up. My exit ticket. My moment to take a break from working and go to the US and Europe for maybe 2 months (this is what I look forward to doing ---- IF I manage to save enough).

5. Being single since December, I've learned a lot more lessons the past 6 months. Not to sound amoral, but my mind has become more liberal and less conservative. I'm pertaining about my perception towards NSA statuses and experiences. Not just the 1 night stand sort of thing where an eventual walk of shame is part of the procession, but hmmm it's hard to put into words. But knowing I'll be leaving Singapore in a not so distant future (God willing / hopefully) has opened my mind up to the possibilities and experiences and all that they entail. Whereas before, they were more about conquests for fun (and world domination/conquest - entries of which have seen been kept private ;) ), now they feel more like living the good experiences and enjoying the adrenaline. Enjoying the power that one can command with sex. (Sex as in not particularly pertaining to the act.) Sex is more than just an act now, it now involves power, domination and appeal. You either know how to control and use it, or ... You're missing out on the experience (says the liberal thinker). There's more to it than seeking a relationship or seeking a shag. There is now a grey area where the best of both worlds can be achieved. The only fair warning of course: "the person who falls in love first, LOSES." (Ang mainlove talo.) And so far, I'm happy to say that since being single...I haven't lost yet. I flirt with the temptation of losing, but the game must go on. blah blah.

6. I've been so stressed with work but I didn't let it overcome me. I actually relished the experience. Last week I had several moments where the pressure and technical difficulty constrained by time almost brought me to the brink of tears, but I just pushed on believing in my capabilities of solving the technical aspects and requirements needed for the job. I was so elated by overcoming each challenge that came my way, realizing the HR email I got before the last minute requirement came up that I wasn't only getting renewed but also getting a Bonus was only the icing on top of the cake. I live and work for those moments when after the struggle of trying to resolve an issue, you come out of the rubbles and dust and see the sun shining and you realize you got through all of it on your own. Belief in one's capabilities. Knowing I still had "it" was endearing enough to let me soldier on the next challenges that came with providing the solution as required. I rewarded myself after working 50 hours of 72 a night out with my housemate to watch How to Train Hour Dragon 2 - which was definitely worth it and a great way to de-stress.

7. I'm still feeling thankful that my parents freed us (my siblings and I) from any financial obligation to help out. I can't imagine being the way I am today, if my mom needed me to send money to pay for utilities, monthly allowance or whatever. So, despite thinking sometimes that I wish my parents could give me more (youngest child syndrome), I live everyday thankful for my upbringing and current situation to say that life is great and that it wouldn't be that way partly if my parents had reared me differently. To return my thanks, I decided to pledge booking my mom and dad, bro-SIL-niece-nephew, two rooms in Marina Bay Sands when they visit Singapore on September. I'm saying visit Singapore and not me because they're only coming so my nephew can go to legoland Malaysia. Hahaha. He's been such a good brother to my niece, he deserves a big brother reward :)


  1. Re #4: The supportive friend in me is super happy for you! ;) The clingy friend in me is kinda wishing the departure wouldn't be that soon. Of course, selfless person that I am (hahaha!), the former beats the latter sentiment! :D

    1. thanks friendship! still waiting for results though so cross fingers :) haha thats why im encouraging you to push through with your plans as well so you know we'll be geographically closer! :) too early to think about leaving though. i get depress thinking about it