CH247: No Regrets. No Turning Back.

"Earlier after the shower I felt like, this is it! I'm going on a big adventure! There's so much to be thankful this year and it can feel overwhelming but all I can feel is just be thankful about everything! :)"

As I'm typing this in the Singapore Airline lounge, I realize that I'm not leaving Singapore with a heavy heart. This is what it's like to have lived an experience without regrets. This is what it's like to have lived life. This is what it's like to make the most of what life has to offer.

I embrace my leaving Singapore to go to my next adventure with a humble heart. 2014 had its share of ups and downs, but all the experiences have made me a better person. There really is so much to be thankful for, my life yes tear up thinking about them! I guess this is what it means to feel overwhelmed...bittersweet!

So last night, I booked a suite at the Marina Mandarin for my going away party. It seems vain to be hosting one, but I wanted a party not to celebrate my leaving but more to get the chance to see the people who have made my stay in Singapore a memorable one.

Thank you Angelo for organizing much of the surprise and to Jon for the video that made me cry not because I was sad but because I was dearly touched by it. It doesn't happen often that I cry in front of a huge crowd, but who cares! :) I don't often show how vulnerable I feel, but in the company of the people I shall treasure memories with, I guess there was no better time to cry.

Pictures!

And this happened :))

Keep loving life everybody! Xoxo

CH246: Last Full Weekend

My friend from Dublin who I met in BKK is right, numb best describes how I'm feeling at the moment. Stephen also went through the same process prior when his stay in BKK had to wrap up and go back to Dublin.

Numb. Taking on each day as they come. He says I'll never really feel any sort of emotion until the moment I am in the plane and realize that everything really is happening. It's more surreal than trepidatious I guess - to be about to experience the things I only read other millenials write about - quitting job, traveling and moving.

It's still like any other day. Last night though, was worth remembering. I watched hunger games mockingjay part 1 with Ange and Jon.

And then we went clubbing. :)

And for the last time, had supper in Maxwell after all the dancing!

Fun night... I hope to see you guys in Sydney Mardi Gras! X

CH245: An Ode to Mom

Last night, I spoke with my mom to give her an update on the stuff I've packed and the time she needs to be in the airport for when I arrive.

I think my relationship with my mom has become better since I've grown older. During our FaceTime session, I told her about how I spoke with Issa (one of my closest friends who lives in Sydney now) and she told me I'll be her official travel buddy around Australia when I move. I told Issa, yes! (Of course) but it will only be the case until I find a partner. And my mom keenly asked what Issa had to say in response. I relayed to my mom that Issa said - "well that won't take too long." And then we both laughed.

Also, since I'm in a bit of a pinch because my salary will be held for a week or two after I leave, I borrowed some cash from my mom to continue to pay for the pension I bought that's on auto debit. I didn't want to touch my pocket money budget for Europe and my money in Australia is locked in until I get there. So during the course of the conversation, my mom told me, "you know what, you can forget about paying me back, the money is yours." And I was of course shocked! I told her I'll pay her back when I finally get settled in Sydney, heck, I'll buy her and dad tickets to visit me for Christmas and the new Year. After hearing that, she then told me how my dad fervently mused to her how when they're retired, they'll have to dedicate 3 months each year - 1 month respectively for Australia, New Zealand and LA to visit us kids and their grandkids! Haha, I so look forward to that!

Here's to you mom.

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An Ode to Mom (November 18, 2014)

I remember the days when you made me flash cards to help me memorize bible verses for a competition in school.

I remember when we recorded to cassette tape my dictations so as to help me memorize poems for another competition in school.

I remember how you helped rent a costume for me last minute for my stage performance of Annabel Lee for our English week contest.

Gosh, I think it was a coincidence, my horror upon seeing the most princely outfit you could find - all covered in sequin. I didn't win for the performance but I won Mr. eloquence.

I remember the fights we had when I was younger - How I'd slam the door and lock it to get away.

I remember also the time you accompanied me to ROTC (military service course in college) because I was learning to drive. Only to miss each other out because your phone batt died so I was left with the task of driving home by myself.

In retrospect, that's how I earned the courage to drive. Hmm, maybe it wasn't a coincidence we didn't meet up after my training then that time.

I remember all of these things and more. But despite the good and the bad, I am reminded of the love you have for me and the love i have for you.

This one's for you mom, I love you very much! 

CH244: Family Visits SG

So more than a month ago, my family visited me here in Singapore. It was a bit stressful planning the perfect holiday considering there were two toddlers - one 5 year old and another just turned a year old.

For anybody interested, since my nephew wanted to celebrate his birthday in Legoland, half of the trip was spent in Johor Bahru Malaysia while the other in Singapore:

Day 1: Tuesday 

09:05 Arrival (T2)
11:00 Check-in MBS
12:00 Lunch
13:00 Infinity Pool
20:10 Dinner
21:30 Wonderfull Lights Show
22:00 Bed

**gardens by the bay was included in the itinerary but we decided to move it to Saturday - which didn't push through since the toddlers wanted to sleep in lol

Day2: Wednesday 

08:30 Breakfast
10:00 Check-out MBS

10:30 universal studios Singapore
18:00 Dinner DTF Sentosa
19:30 Get Stuff from MBS
19:40 Pickup by Taxi from MBS

21:30 check in to hotel 

Day3: Thursday 

08:00 Breakfast

10:00 legoland waterpark
17:00 Go to JB Outlet
20:00 Dinner
21:30 Back to Hotel

**it was supposed to be the theme park first but since it was overcast and with a chance of rain we decided to do the waterpark. Thankfully the skies cleared up

Day4: Friday

08:00 Breakfast
10:00 Checkout

10:30 legoland
17:00 Pickup by Taxi to go to Swissotel

19:00 check in
20:30 Dinner Chinatown / Stroll around Raffles City Mall

Day5: Saturday

09:00 Breakfast
10:30 Check-out Hotel
11:00 Orchard/Somerset/ Shopping
14:00 Go to Airport
15:00 Check-in airport
17:40 Departure

It was nice to have spent time with my family. I also took the opportunity to have them get extra luggage to bring two bags of my stuff back home - half and most of which were winter stuff I bought but haven't used and the rest were tidbits like souvenirs from travel etc. We don't get a lot of opportunities to be reunited so it's always nice to have a reunion. My sister and family unfortunately couldn't come along as my niece was just 3 months old that time. So maybe next time the reunion will be in NZ or Australia! :)

Of note:
1. The stay in MBS from my experience is always a pleasant one. It can feel a bit too touristy with all the people in the Infinity Pool area, so it's appreciated that they have a section where there are no kids allowed - Adult pool!

2. It was my first time staying in Swissotel and I felt their service was fantastic. It was definitely a breeze checking out and the staff were attentive despite the lot of people on the weekend we were there. Marina Bay Sands I would say - you would have to call the attention of a staff to get help instead of the staff sensing your needs and offering it. But I'm not complaining

3. To go to LEGOLAND, I would highly suggest renting a private vehicle / van to bring you to and fro Singapore. It's so much easier to go through immigration compared to getting a bus.

4. Service is much different in Johor Bahru compared to Singapore. The hotel we stayed in Hotel Granada had a great location. The hotel was average, but we were a bit put-off that the room they gave us despite the specification in the request not to be a smoking room - was a smoking room. So when we got in, it smelled strongly of smoke (for one of the rooms). I booked their LEGOLAND package which I think was a deal and just extended the stay by one night and correspondingly extended our LEGOLAND tickets from 1 day to 2 days entry.

Anyway, pictures!

And I complain to friends how I'm so dark now. I want to be lighter when I go to Europe! I don't want too much contrast when it starts snowing! lol 

Family photo!

With my housemate Louisa

Last look at the view

Like an intern doing a coffee run for everybody hahaha

More pictures!

CH243: INTJ

I ----

Your personality type: INTJ (turbulent variant)

Strength of individual traits: Introverted: 12%, Intuitive: 24%, Thinking: 13%, Judging: 31%, Turbulent: 6%.

http://www.16personalities.com/intj-personality

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After Friday night's Halloween themed HOHOL (hang out hang out Lang) with friends, the following day I found myself wanting to just stay in and do nothing.

Rather than do nothing, actually my housemate hosted some friends over our place where she served turon (a Filipino dessert). But aside from that, my plans to go to the gym have been set aside to do nothing more and nothing else. It seems I found myself in a perpetual state of introspection as of late.

The other day, I found myself thinking that it seems the only attention I like getting is the sort laced with sexual tension...I didn't host a party for my 28th birthday but decided to go to Europe instead. There's a lot of things going on at the moment, admittedly, with work and planning for sabbatical. I haven't really thought much of how big a move to Australia is. Maybe I just don't want to think so far ahead of the worries I might and will probably face. My emotions are in a rut and it seems the only thing I can find worthwhile to escape this hollowness is through sex. Not so good hearing it said out loud not seeing it written down.

I was reluctant to host any sort of going away party for when I leave. The idea of hosting a celebration to commemorate my leaving seemed alien to me and rather felt narcissistic to some extent. But on a last minute decision while I was on a booking spree for some train rides I needed for Europe, I decided to book one as I don't really know when I'll see again - the people I invited.

It has a lot to do with my personality type I guess. Rather than spend the last month I have here in Singapore - getting drunk and partying, I've gone on auto pilot to introspect and reflect the life I lived here the past 3 years 10 months. There's so much to digest my mind just shuts down and I feel sometimes desperate to just zoom forward and find myself in a better place - living my dreams. Alas, dreams are worked for. So between now and getting there...well who knows, it might take a while.