CH258: A Posse Ad Esse

...from possibility to actuality.

The more I stay here in Sydney, the more I realize that there is so much to be thankful for. Prior to moving, I've had all these fuzzy dreams and ideologies and wishful thinking on how my life will be like when I move. I was going around Europe comparing and noting down how I was shaping my hopes and expectation for Sydney in my head. (Call it wishful thinking)

While things did not exactly start the way I had hope for them to be, I still feel immensely blessed. I sometimes wonder to myself before going to sleep (I like to introspect and digest thoughts before transitioning to the next day) why so much good has come my way. If karma was real, I feel the scales have tipped over.

Career
I was preparing for the worst case of not finding a job for 6 months and struggling to settle here in Australia. There were a lot of people saying that it will be tough to find a job - on the lines of - give yourself at least 3 months or 6 or a year to find job. I got a job short of 3 months (10 weeks) and I am more than thank ful for that.

It's a job that is in the field I am in and it's a progression from where I left off in Singapore. It's a Senior consultant position with a small consulting firm, and from the get-go, I am liking the vibe of the office. I get to work with other senior consultants and for the ~2 weeks I've been here, I can tell I can get along with the people I will be working with.

What overwhelms me with this blessing is that from a lot of people I've gotten to know here in Sydney, a lot of them found jobs that were off tangent to the track they were on. Lower salary grade, zero experience, start from scratch.

Friends and Family
I am thankful for the friends I have. Old friends, new friends. I stayed with one of my closest friends from University for the first 10 weeks that I lived here in Sydney. She's one of the truest friends I have and she's also my confidant. I'm the type of person who gauges my affinity to people based on "wavelength" and she is one of the few people I am definitely 100% in-sync with. 

When the year started off and I was in New York, I told myself that for 2015, my resolution is to be a better son, better sibling, better uncle and better friend. I came up with that resolution after I met a great set of amazing people when I was in New York. (I had a friend I met when I was on vacation in Bangkok (almost a year ago from now) who introduced me to this friend in New York). I told myself that for 2015, I will work on being the person who my friends would want to go to - to talk, to have a drink with, to hang out, to be the person who would listen to their problems, to be the person they could trust.

I've come to a point in my life (nearing 3-0) that I enjoy a small group of people I trust and love being with, than a big group of unfocused relationships.

A huge chunk on how I managed to make it through to moving and finally starting to settle here in Sydney is due to my family. I love the kind of dynamic I have with them now. I'm happy to have received such strong support from my parents and siblings - on the financial and emotional aspect of the move. It's humbling to realize that despite the distances we have from another (Los Angeles, Auckland, Sydney, Quezon City, Middle East) we are able to be there for each other when needed - in part due to technological advances.

More than anything, I am thankful for the friends and family who believed ...




More than anything, I am thankful for the friends and family who believed I will be able to make it and push through the challenges of moving to a new city and country without a job and with only savings in tow. There were several occasions on the 10 weeks of being jobless (longer than 10 weeks if you count the trip to US, Europe and a couple of weeks in Manila) where I questioned the timing and decision to move. I was comfortable living in Singapore - with a stable job, a good source of cash flow, etc. But I knew I wanted something more ... more stability and security. And after everything, I finally reached a point in my life where those possibilities can become an actuality.

Sydney

I am thankful that I was able to apply and get approved for Permanent residency here in Australia. Now that I found a job and have started working here for almost two weeks, I am excited by the other possibilities I can think of making an actuality. Despite being relatively the same in terms of expensiveness as compared to Singapore, there is a difference in the quality of life. On one front, the amount I am paying for rent in the place I am staying in here is about the same as in Singapore - except it's more spacious. On another front that I was surprised about is that despite having higher tax than Singapore, based on my initial computation, my net here will still be higher than my gross in Singapore. That lead me to realize that Singapore has become a saturated market for my skills.

Pictures!

CH257: Start of things to come

This week was rather busy. From finding a place to move to, to looking for the best FOREX place to change the USD I brought with me, to applying for a credit card, I couldn't be any happier that things are about to change.

I've decided to just for the time being find a room instead of my own flat. Getting a flat here would usually entail it being unfurnished so there would be costs like getting my own refrigerator, furniture, setting up internet etc. I found a place which would just be a 5 min walk from a train station that is 4 stations away from my workplace. It's all settled and done. I'll move into it on the 25th as the place is new and they had renovation works.

Another pleasant news was getting approved for my ANZ credit card (ANZ frequent flyer black) two hours after they received the documents they requested from me! Now I can start building up my credit score :)

Patience does pay off.

CH256: BEST BIRTHDAY GIFT EVER!

As I posted into my twitter account recently, I am officially FUNemployed! After 10 weeks of looking for a job here in Sydney, I finally found a job that is in my field of experience and a permanent position at that. It's a step in the right direction towards settling here in Australia. Previously, I have mentioned that I am open to finding jobs that may be off-tangent to what I do just so I can have a paycheck and get to start living again, as opposed to living off of my savings. But I promised myself I will be patient and avoid just jumping on any job because of the following reasons:

1. Pay range - I have 6 years of experience in the job I do and the salary range will be entirely different if I shift career just because I was finding it difficult to get a job in a competitive SAP market.
2. Career progression - My long term goal is to either to become a Project Manager or a Solutions Architect. (I am still interested in Big Data so a Masters in that direction is still something of an idea I play around with in the back of my head). So staying on the career path I am in - where my current role (Senior Consultant) is - is still in the right track to the two progressions I have plans on becoming
3. Easier said than done - What I noticed in the few jobs I sent my CV to - to test the grounds of shifting career - was that it was easier said than done. Given that I have 6+ years invested in the work I have been doing, it would seem that entry level positions are more open to finding fresh graduates or entry level people because they will be cheaper I guess.

So it was beyond elation and excitement when 6 hours after my second interview (technical), I got a call from the HR Manager telling me that they were offering me the job. 1 hour after my interview, she called me up to ask for my references which I readily gave (they were ready from previous requirements). I was looking at flying off to the Gold Coast to celebrate my birthday to get my mind off the anxiety of waiting for the news on two job prospects (I had an interview as well last Thursday with a different company).

Anyway, I wasn't too excited with celebrating my 29th birthday primarily because I don't like the number. 29 is a prime number! And my 28th year has been most amazing so maybe I was trying to hold on to being 28. 28 saw 2 trips to Europe! I turned 28 in Portugal, touring the fairy-tale like castle of Sintra and exploring the western most tip of the European continent among other things. It was a year of travel and freedom! 27th was more stifling and learning more about myself in the context of a relationship, so I'm totally over being 27. But 28 was the best year of my life so far! I met so many great friends - and I also had to leave many of them when I left Singapore. It was a year of personal development, transformation, and enlightenment!

Why am I even still talking about 28 and rambling like an idiot?! I just got a job for my 29th birthday! I think it's the best gift I can ever receive in the context of my life I am in. Not only for financial reasons, but it felt like when I got the job offer the day before my birthday, that it was some sort of sign akin to "Welcome to Adulthood!" Time to look for insurance, a post paid plan (again), set up my savings and investment, etc!

I may not like being 29, but whoever said they liked being adults and worrying about bills and life? 29 will be my transition period to being 30 which is a year I feel look forward to more!

CH255: Number 2.

....In the calming noise of the vacuum cleaner, I find myself immersed in thoughts of nothing, flushing out the negativity to start a day anew.

...In the cool breeze, warm sun and soothing sound of the sea, I realized how similar I am at from Grade 5 - high school senior.

Most of the time just in second place running for honors. It was a fun competition then. I'm not sure I can say the same with now.

For the interviews I've had, I seem to be edged out by 1 more person. One had more experience with SAP mobility. Another one had SAP Hana experience. And the last one, for a contract role, I didn't bother to ask. I was just told there has been a request for budgetary approval to have another person on board - me - the number 2.

There has been a sort of cycle with these. Thursday I hear the news, Thursday I get another interview scheduled.

I can't say I'm sad. I'm actually fine. A little feeling of frustration would come by and then go. (Maybe if I didn't have savings, then I'd be depressed). This is what life is, you don't always get what you want. That, in a race, you may not have finished first, but there's comfort in knowing you finished second, still ahead of the rest. And the other thought, at least I'm making it through shortlisting and getting to final round of interviews. It should come eventually.

For now, I'm still on vacation! :)

CH254: Acrobatics

After going through the Aerialize Open Day, I realized I wasn't afraid of falling and hurting myself playing around on Lyra, silks and trapeze.

I also discovered how easily I picked up on the instructions. Maybe this is my calling? Haha jk.

There are so many activities that can be explored here down under. I really enjoyed the trials and once I do get a job, this could be a class I could enjoy and really get into.

I had to ask myself whether that's my tan line or muffin top fat line haha

CH253: Somethings, Sometimes, Someone

Continuing on with the introspection from the previous post, as I told Angelo (sorry friend no cross linking on Blogger mobile lol), my impatience also extends to dating.

Maybe, maybe, maybe, part of the reason why on the apps, I rarely initiate any messaging is because - it's exhausting initiating small talk. I rarely go into long chats but mostly stop at saying thank you when given a compliment or say hi back and just not reply because there's been so much messages (I used to reply to all but stopped after a few days of having it in Singapore 4 years ago). It does seem callous and discourteous. But I don't say this with ego, since reinstalling the app when I became single a little over a year ago, I've had numerous messages come in. I was OC at first to make sure there wasn't a sign showing unread messages, but I got bored with the menial task, and now I've got ~2000 unread messages in one app.

But the point of that narrative just now, was because when I said impatience in dating, it probably related to being spoiled and getting what I want as I wrote in the previous entry. I reply to only those who seem interesting and interested because it's easier that way. No effort. No trying too hard. Everything has to be quick. Go into dating, you both like each other - go for it, commit, become exclusive yadah yadah. I lose interest (after much contemplation it isn't as much to do with pride) when I sense the other party's interest has waned. I say to myself, why go through the trouble.

I've given this much thought, because maybe I'm a romantic (hopeless), but after going out on a date which just coincided with valentines, I felt chemistry with someone and the Sparks just flew. But it wasn't like the previous ones with a magnetic reaction to just go and become steady. It's the first time for me to have to participate in "testing the water." And now I'm clueless. I like the other person enough to not be totally disinterested, but it opens up the idea, so does this mean there's a game at play? Someone seeing other people and moving the chess pieces one move at a time - eventually deciding the game then checkmate? Oh well, I asked the question and the answer just went along the lines of - let's not stick to labels or whatever for now and let's see how it goes. For a change, I'll be patient.

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Yesterday was a wonderful day at the beach. My close friend and I just chilled and hung out for 5 hours there. Thankfully, after a previous late night out consuming 3 glasses of gin and tonic as well as 5-6 glasses of pure blonde, and with very little sleep, I didn't get a hang over. I'm attributing this feat to age given in a little over a month, I'll be one year away from 30!

We had lots of fun jumping into the water! Starting off in the pontoon for smaller jumps and building up to the higher one. I say building up because I had to be patient with my friend as she tried and succeeded in overcoming her fears of jumping. :) It was easier being patient on this front.

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Talk of change, while walking back home earlier, I was excited to realize that the state of happiness and contentment that had dawned on me when I was in Europe is still alive here in Sydney! :) I tried to think why after my volunteer work at the Sydney Mardi Gras Film Festival do I still feel this way, and I realized that I'm free.

I'm free from feeling secure and protected. I'm simply free - To be myself, to do what I want (within the bounds of law), to just live my life. Now it would be a scary thought not being secure and protected but I have permanent residency here in Australia as a safety net. My decisions are my decisions because I want to try and am very open to trying new things.

A first would be working at a Chinese restaurant part time! It was surprisingly enjoyable. How did this happen? I simply went to the restaurant my close friend part times in and the auntie there asked me if I was interested. Thinking it will be unexpected, I said yes. It pays well for 3.5 hours of work - plus they feed you haha. It put a smile on my face when my mom (I heard it in her voice) found it amusing and surprising that I did well and enjoyed waiting tables, taking take away orders on the phone and helping out in the kitchen and floor area. In this sense, I was free from the protective prejudice my parents would have had if I told them I'd work in let's say jolibee or McDonald's to earn extra money when I was studying. If I was still in Uni and I suggested that so I can have extra cash, I believe they would have just increased my allowance. Hmm actually the thought never occurred to me to work part time to get extra money back in college. I simply had to ask and use the trump card statement "my siblings went to more expensive schools compared to UPD."

Another change I noticed earlier was that I'm less introverted than I was before. I wouldn't normally want to be around strangers, but when I was helping people queue in the film festival, I was comfortable chatting up random strangers in queue and making conversation. I didn't mind wearing a bright pink outfit for volunteers of the festival. I didn't mind standing outside the cinemas collecting voting slips and smiling at totally random strangers and genuinely telling them to have a good night on their way home. My old self would have been exhausted being all preppy, but I did that because I was there as a volunteer. It's not my cause I'm there for, it's the festival's. Traveling brought this out of me. When you travel, you immerse yourself in the ways of the country you're visiting. You become a chameleon and adapt to the environment. It's not being plastic or hypocritical. It's just adjusting the traits you already have. Everyone has a natural affinity to something and distinct personalities, but it doesn't mean we have to box ourselves in. The important thing is to try and experience. Because through experience, we get opinion.  And through experience, we discover things we might have said we couldn't but actually could.

I see my permanent residency as an investment (given how expensive it was ... Relatively) and I can see how I'm reaping its benefits so far. I feel so at home in Australia. Not to say anything negative against Singapore or the Philppines - but Australia is home now. 

.... Although Australian PR was easier to get than SG PR (in my case, i.e. Profession) so maybe I have foreclosed SG too early. No regrets!

CH252: An Introspective Digression

After my trip around the US and Europe a couple of months back, I saw within myself a change that I was more laid back. In comparison to being hot headed fresh out of college and looking to be in a rush to climb the corporate ladder. In certain events during my trip like when I lost my iPAD when i left it in the train toilet...I was rushing out to get off my stop because the train was going to Ventimiglia after. Italian trains are on time. Well I didn't really mind losing the iPad. I was quickly over it after I spoke with my mom about it.

Digressing. Anyway, since arriving in Sydney, I realized I'm still a bit hot headed and easily impatient. Just a week and a half into living here, the pressure had built up for me to find a job and get settled in. I have to force myself out of the zone of thinking about it to be able to relax. I could be enjoying myself, going to museums, having fun, relaxing, but my natural instinct had been to situate myself in a position of being here for a few months without a job. It's not as if the recruiters and companies will work according to my schedule, so I've been bound by other people's schedule and somehow the impatience just grows.

I'm not sure if that's a good thing to create a stressful and high pressure environment for me to strive harder. I've applied to multiple jobs not directly related to what I do just to be able to put up a cushion in case the layers of comfort I've submitted my applications to fall through. My mind plays a situation where I put myself in a situation that I've failed. I know this feeing before when I left my job in HP during the height of the US (and global) recession to take a break and learn the lesson and desperation of being unemployed. Maybe I was traumatized by that experience so I'm reliving worst case scenarios in my head.

So as I've introspected, I figured that the only reason I am the way I am now is because for the most part of my life, I got the things I wanted and aspired for. I got high honors in school because I studied hard and worked for it. I wanted to go around the globe in 42 days so I saved up for it and traveled...although this one was partially enabled by my mom who so graciously cushioned my expenses and even gave me emergency money. I wanted to move out of SG and migrate to Australia permanently, so I did. There have been so many things I wanted and thought to have needed and attained, that the concept of begging for a job to be able to settle in Australia has become a situation outside my comfort zone.

I did play the situation in my head before I moved and felt mentally I was well prepared. Maybe I am or was, but not to the extent I imagined.

But now I'm here, there are no regrets or thoughts of wanting to leave or feeling like I made the wrong choice. I'm excited actually of what comes after I find a job because then I'll be free to navigate my life with security...which then comes to full circle with me getting what I wanted after overcoming the obstacle of finding a job.

So...as i digressed, I guess it brings about the reality that dreams do come true after all...with hard work. But I tend to underestimate stuff and I feel for the most part, I haven't worked hard enough to have gotten the things I dreamt of.

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Also, worth sharing, I've been reading the Velvet Rage by Alan Downs. And here's an interesting passage from the book with regards to passion.

"Passion is the repeated experience of joy in doing something. When one discovers passion, it is usually because an activity seems to produce joy each time it is performed. Normally, there is a diminishing return on the joy associated with an activity. Not so when passion is present. The activity produces a surprising and satisfying amount of joy, again and again.

"Passion is a meta-emotion-an emotion that is felt only after observing other emotions over time. Passion is present when you observe that the same activity consistently brings you joy."

CH251: A Look Back: Sintra, Cabo de Roca & Cascais, Portugal

A day trip out to Sintra, Cabo de roca (the western most tip of Europe) and Cascais. 

Sintra, visiting the Palace of Pena was amazing. A UNESCO heritage site, it's definitely worth a visit.
The tour group was also nice. Aside from me, there was:

1. Jenny and Sarah - jenny the grandma was with her granddaughter who is studying in London for an exchange program. They live in Sacramento. Jenny was born in China but moved to Taipei when she was 1 and then moved to the US when she was 20. She's been living in the US for 45 years now she says.

2. Nanita and Bob - a couple staying in New York but recently moved to Kentucky. Nanita was apparently Filipino, but I learned of that by the tour's end.

3. Sabrina, Ria and Gabriella - a single (separated) mom with her kids from Toronto.

haha, yes i just did a profile of the tour group i was with. It was a pleasant tour and I highly recommend it. As was mentioned this was booked through viator.com (where most of my tours were booked).

The visit to Sintra comprised of the Palace of Pena and the lunch break in the city center where I ate at a cafe with a menu set with "by Gordon Ramsay". So, the roasted cod I had cost 39.00 euros complete with appetizer of bread, olives and cheese (i think it was camembert) and a glass of Muralhas (vinho verde - green sparkling wine).

The visit to Cabo de Roca which is the western most tip of Europe was reminiscent of my visit to the northern most tip of New Zealand where you can see two seas meet. The view was nice. It was interesting to hear that from that viewpoint, the Portuguese used to think it was the end of the world as the horizon was just the Atlantic.

The trip to Cascais was less eventful. I just went around the city center. As was told by the guide, it was a bit like Beverly Hills where the rich people usually stay in. I just had a 3 euro Gelato and went my way. I had Milk Caramel and Toasted Almonds. They were soooooo goood! :)

Then after that we went back to Lisbon via the coastal road to drop Sabrina and kids in Belem.

[Side Note]:
I know I said in the previous entry that there would be less narration, but I found that the entry I put up in Facebook already had a good narration of it. If I recall correctly, I did that with the intent of just copy pasting the narration to here hahaha.

CH250: A Look Back: Lisbon, Portugal

From the airport coming out of the undeground Metro, I was pleasantly taken aback by how beautiful Lisbon was. Maybe because the weather was fantastic, but that's the impression that's stuck with me upon coming out. Clean, white and pristine - well at least the city center or the area I came out of was. The weather cooperated pretty much the whole length of the stay. It was a European spring (start of it) so a fine amount of layering was in order :)

During this leg of the ~9-10 day trip to Portugal and Spain, I did not just stay in Lisbon but also visited Sintra (the Fairy Tale castle which is also a UNESCO heritage site) - of which, the tour there included Cascais, and the western coast of Lisbon - as well as did a whole day trip to the Belem district where there are more historical architectures (Palaces, Monuments etc).

Anyway, this is a "LOOK" back and not a "NARRATIVE" back hahaha, so after nearly a year (maybe 10 months) since I visited the place, enjoy the selected pictures! xoxo

CH249: Unsettled

So, I'm back in Manila tentatively. Just in time for my Cousin's wedding tomorrow/later. I can't help but feel not at home considering that in two weeks time I'll be off again - and this time, for the most part, for good.

More goodbyes. More see you soon. More new adventures. More things to come.

Since being back, I can't help but reminisce the adventures I've been on the past 42 days. I'm glad I went all in with pushing it through despite budgetary constraints :) my mom did help buoy my financial considerations :)) The itch has been scratched and I'm feeling more and more scared as well as hopeful and excited for whatever may come. Dreams of saving up, getting a loan and buying a house and car to call my own. I'm 28 but just starting this journey! Some friends already have houses and those stuff, and all I have are memories. It's not a bad thing, I guess. As I read through a friend's recommended book, "Velvet Rage", life is mostly about authentic validation. It's a psychological need every human has. And for the most part of the past 3-4 years, it's very I get it from.

I'm hopeful things will be for the better and I can finally find a place to call home and get all settled.

Now, a quick look back

Amsterdam - canal

Brussels - atomium 

Bruges

Milan - galleria Vittorio Emanuele 

Genoa - Palazzo Real Hall of mirrors 

Pisa - leaning tower

Cinqueterre - Vernazza

Nice, France

Cot d'Azur - Eze, France

Monte Carlo, Monaco

Lyon

Paris

Versailles

New York (Brooklyn)

LA

Malibu (Getty Villa)

Santa Barbara

San Simeon (Hearst Castle Neptune Pool - where they shot lady Gaga's GUY)

Monterey (Aquarium)

San Francisco